Bob’s Burgers-Play For Today

belchers

BOB’S BURGERS

PLAY FOR TODAY


Linda was eager to put together a big lunch for a social function she was attending that day, an alternative to the burgers Bob was supplying.

Variety was always, for her, the extra spice you gave to life after all.

Twenty or so vanilla cream egg rolls ought to suffice” she thought, and promptly entered the kitchen to set about her project.

She assembled the necessary ingredients, she sorted out the vanilla cream and butter waiting for her in the fridge, she hard boiled the eggs, and she took out a fresh loaf to prepare.

Only one thing was missing.

Make that several.

The tools required to spread the magic.

She looked everywhere, in all of the cupboards. Not a trace.

She walked out of the kitchen and came to the lounge, where a peculiar sight greeted her.

Her youngest daughter, the ever unpredictable firecracker Louise, was crouched down on the floor holding something in her hand that looked familiar.

On the sofa was the cutlery that had gone missing from the kitchen.

“Louise honey, what are you doing?” Linda asked

“Putting on a show” a frank Louise revealed.

“With the kitchen knives?” Linda asked.

Louise nodded.

Linda saw that she was playing with a salt shaker.

“Careful not to get that over the sofa honey” said Linda.

“Relax mom, I emptied the salt out before I started” Louise revealed.

Linda knelt down beside her, trying to work out what her play was about.

“Oh I get it, the knives represent gang members, it’s a big bloody brawl right? That sort of thing is always your kind of scene isn’t it?”

Louise laughed

“No Mom, it’s nothing like that, it’s a comedy drama”

“Comedy drama?” said Linda, a little surprised.

“The little salt shaker is the pushover who has to overcome the might of our main hero, the sharpest tool in the shed”

“The shed?”

“That’s what I’m calling the sofa” Louise revealed, “It’s like a big cage where the meanest and maddest fighters come together”

“Ah, so it is a brawl then?” Linda asked.

“It starts off with that, but it’s a lot more personal than that” Louise explained.

“Really?” Linda asked.

“See, the sharpest tool in the shed has a weakness that’s known only to her and the salt shaker” Louise revealed.

Linda smiled.

“This tool’s a ‘she’ eh? I get where this is going, aw”

“Yeah, well if you can put that together, the rest of the math you do will be a cakewalk”

“Honey, who do you want to put this play on in front of?” Linda asked.

“I’d rather just keep this one to myself, its good therapy to the sick thoughts going on in my head at the moment” said Louise.

Linda grew concerned.

“Oh my floppy eared favourite, what’s wrong? You’re not thinking of dicing yourself are you?”

“No, no Mom, it’s the other kind of ‘sick’ I’m used to” Louise explained.

“Oh” Linda said, sighing in relief.

“Anyway, the little shaker is just that. He’s a shaker. He thinks he’s tough; he wants to let everyone know it, but the sharpest tool? She knows him inside out, she’s been there when he was humbled one time in a kickball incident, and he went down hard. He doesn’t let the experience show, but some of it is evident on his face”

“Honey, the shaker doesn’t have a face, its clear glass”

“Now you see the horrors of what kickball does to you” said Louise in a cold and foreboding voice.

“Oh, this is horrifying, I’m hooked” said an enthusiastic Linda.

“The sharpest tool wants to end this quickly, so she can advance to the next stage in the game, so she makes sure to tackle him quick and make sure when he lands, it’s as gently as possible. She wants him humbled, but not hurt, she tells him to take care”

“So how does the play end for him?”

“It’s an ongoing journey, he knows he’s outmatched by the sharpest tool in the shed, but that won’t deter him from learning from her…and she’s sort of impressed by that, she has to be, she likes him a lot”

Linda could now sense what this was all about.

“Honey, what got you into this sort of thing? It had to have been recent” said Linda.

“Just something that occurred to me after a birthday lately” Louise said.

“Oh I get it” Linda said, smiling.

She got up, dusted herself off and turned to walk back out of the room.

“Honey, mommy needs those knives back soon, you finish up and I’ll give you one of the leftover sandwiches I’m making up for my social, ok?”

“Make sure you use the sharpest tool there is when you do” Louise revealed.

“I might even put some salt on the rolls as well, don’t want your little shaker to feel left out” Linda replied.

Louise smiled.

“Thanks mom, I don’t feel as sick anymore, a bit, but not much”

Linda nodded, not wanting to say what was on the tip of her brain next.

She kept that to herself.

She remembered what that recent birthday was.

It was Rudy’s.

He had wanted to spend the day having everyone who attended the party help him put on a play he had written with finger puppets, only to be dragged into an incident that saw them make off with a bouncy castle and it ultimately got everyone detained. Louise felt so bad about the incident she ultimately helped a distraught Rudy put on the play.

As Linda left the room, she pondered the clarity she was holding back from her daughter.

Honey, you’re not sick, you’re in love”

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Bobs Burgers-The First Domino

belchers

BOB’S BURGERS

THE FIRST DOMINO

At the breakfast table, the Belchers were discussing the day before, a day where a decision had been made, a vow taken by the youngest of them.

“So this is a bit of a turning point isn’t it?” said Bob

“Definitely” replied Louise to her father.

“No more turkeys, even for thanksgiving?” Louise’s older sister Tina added as she poured cereal into each of the children’s bowls.

“Gene would you like milk with that?” said Tina.

Gene shook his head.

“If she’s off turkeys, I’m off what they produce” said Gene

“Gene, milk comes from cows, not turkeys” Linda noted

“UNNATURAL SELECTION” Gene snapped back.

“A Belcher promise is a guarantee…or your money back” Louise continued.

“Louise, we don’t pay you to eat” Bob replied

“You don’t even pay me to serve” Louise countered.

“Yeah, well, explain your allowance then” Bob replied.

“That’s not earned is it? That’s just something you’re obligated to give me until I grow out of it. Same with bus passes”

“Louise, who said you could have a bus pass?” Linda said.

“Regular Sized Rudy has one” Louise replied, taking scooping up some of Gene’s cereal with a spoon and consuming the dry golden grahams

“Hey, this tastes better without milk” Louise noted.

“As some other God intended” Gene replied.

“Honey, Rudy has specific needs” Linda replied.

“What about mine? “ Louise argued, “The change I use on the bus ought to go to a big bag of Starburst”

“Louise, you’ve only ever been on a bus twice this year, everywhere else Mom and Dad drive you….” replied Tina

“…Crazy” added Gene.

“Yeah, they do” Louise added.

“This is just a phase honey, come next year you’ll be in the spirit for it again” Linda assured her.

“Yeah, but the spirit of adventure is what it’s all about now isn’t it?” Louise argued, “If we don’t have that in our lives every year, eating turkey rather than tackling one is going to feel like a step down”

“Bob, did you give Rudy your Donna Summer cd?” Linda said, having gotten up to look through her and Bob’s music collection.

“Yeah, I sort of insisted on it” Bob revealed.

“We seem to be giving him a lot of hand outs lately…Louise, didn’t you give him your Freezer Dome belt?” Tina asked.

Louise rubbed her right shoulder tensely.

“How’d you know about that?” she asked.

“He took a fetching photo of himself wearing it. With feather boas. I may have forced him into it, but you have no evidence other than my confession, which may be a lie to cover up the idea he has peculiar notions of fashion sense different from mine” said Gene.

“Yeah, everybody at school’s already heard about that bird feathering himself” said Louise, scooping up more of Gene’s cereal.

“Louise, why’d you give him the belt? He was the first person you eliminated, and with virtually no effort required” said Tina.

“I don’t know, I guess I kind of liked that he insisted on his toughness and that he was willing to try his hand at it rather than cave in. Guy’s the most well-meaning wuss I know, he’s not satisfied with being the first domino you tip over y’know? He wants to mean something more than that” Louise explained.

“He’s your sweet little cupcake isn’t he?” Linda replied.

“MOM” Louise yelled

“Hey, your words not mine and I was there remember?” Linda replied.

“Wow, Louise actually called him her cupcake?” Bob replied

“I was emphasising just how much of a wimp he was” Louise replied.

“And what about you calling him ‘sweet little Rudy’ huh?” Linda responded, clasping both her hands as the warm and enticing notions of sentiment between her little princess and the pint sized ace with asthma gave her stomach butterflies.

“You won’t live to see the end if you bring that up again” snapped Louise

“Alright, you’ve gone from talking turkey to acting like one. Your room Louise, go there, now” ordered Bob.

“Fine” Louise said, and stomped out of the kitchen and headed towards her room.

As soon as she was clear of her family, she permitted herself a wry and humbling smile.

He is my sweet little cupcake isn’t he?” she thought, before her outer adolescence let out a couple of barely audible curse words as she condemned herself for the very thought

Power Rangers Super Megaforce-The Novel

This is the second of what I aim to make three novelizations of Power Rangers Megaforce episodes. I already novelised Mega Mission, which you can read here, and this will be where I deposit my “Super Megaforce” novelization.

As was the case with Mega Mission-The Novel, the story will have it’s own unique elements, characters, and situations, plus I decided to alter the ending ever so slightly, see if you can spot which episodes I borrowed for the new ending. I actually partially based it off a fanedit I made of the episode that I also hope to share someday.

 

Power Rangers: Super Megaforce-The Novel

Doctor Who-The Stolen Earth

stolen earth

The Stolen Earth is a great way to wrap up a golden year of Doctor Who, or it would be if it did’nt indulge in pantomime twiddling of huge oversized knobs (fun fact: that there is a call back to an old BBC2 continuity annoucement). Sadly, I can’t fix how the DoctorDonna fixes things, but what I can do is cut back on a couple of things to create a unique presentation

.regeneration

First of all, we don’t quite get to The Doctor until much later in the edit, we focus on all of the companions first, and even the titles kick in before Rose can look up and power up her weapon to face something that takes ages to arrive. When she arrives, that’s when the titles come.

Much like the recent Stolen Earth edit by Whoflix, I was able to bride parts one and two of the story seemlessly with the regeneration sequence. I took a lot of cues from that version before branching off in my own unique direction, so props to his edit for serving as a good guide to cutting away what doesn’t fit (Cann rambling about constant death that never comes, which never made sense, and especially less so now) and what feels like padding (Shadow Proclamation)

You’ll have to forgive me cutting away before Mickey and Jackie can formerly introduce themselves…cropping screens and what not is beyond my understanding so I had to cut back on the scene to avoid any on-screen credits for part two.

To conclude the edit, I went with having Donna/Doctor survive the metacrisis and not get her mind erased. Much like how my End of Time edit ended with Tennant living to fight another day, let’s give the most down-to-earth companion the opportunity to travel with The Doctor “forever” like she wished

Vimeo is being a pain lately, so you’ll have to use the MEGA link for now

 

Dalek Supreme

Doctor Who-The Zygon Inversion

Zygon

 

Get on your hands and knees for Bonnie Princess Coleman and her little rebel clan as they try to imprint themselves on a global scale, fuelled by a need to secure the Osgood box for prejudiced purposes, while The Doctor attempts to secure a BAFTA with a touching bit of idealism courtesy of THAT speech (not that it helped, only Michelle sodding Gomez secured DW’s sole nomination for the two parter she was in)

This one’s mostly an omnibus edit with only a few cuts here and there to hold back the info dumping of the Osgood box and the reveal of Bonnie just a tad. Also gone is The Doctor’s creepy lurking around the playground.  There were some things I tried to edit around, but found impossible from a narrative standpoint (the bloody church scene). Maybe WhoFlix will have better luck whenever he tackles this one.

 

You Mustn’t Tell-(Original Story)

Note: This is intentionally written in the form of an “adult children’s story”

YOU MUST’NT TELL

This is Sammy York.

But you mustn’t tell.

Sammy York is a secret.

Most of the world has never heard of her.

And yet they do know her.

Yes, she is known to the world.

But not as Sammy York.

Sammy York is a secret.

And you mustn’t tell.

Sammy York is a name behind another name.

A much more famous name.

The Daylight Saver.

That’s right, a superhero

A genuine, true and right superhero

And not one of those types that cling to the cloak of night.

Oh no.

Daylight Saver does exactly what it says on the tin.

She saves the day.

In broad daylight.

She wears a fancy red cape, a white t-shirt, and a mask

And behind that mask is Sammy York.

But you mustn’t tell!

For many years Sammy had dreamed of being a superhero

Ever since she was in school.

Every time the other kids played cops and robbers, she would play the role of neither.

She’d be a superhero.

She’s come swooping in on a soapbox racecar and save the day.

But this annoyed everyone.

It meant the robbers were overpowered and the cops couldn’t do their jobs.

Everybody disliked Sammy in school because of it.

Except three of the boys.

Roger, Ramsey, and Jet.

They always hung around with Sammy and enjoyed playing with her.

They even enjoyed playing with her dolls.

But you mustn’t  tell!

All three of the boys, Roger, Ramsey, and Jet, grew up and became exactly what they played in school.

They became cops.

And Sammy York became a superhero

But you mustn’t tell!

As Daylight Saver, she had captured many crooks with her trusty gadgets and expert martial art skills.

And the public loved her.

But the crooks and the cops didn’t.

Every time Roger, Ramsey and Jet arrived at the scene of the crime, the crime had already been prevented.

The crooks were all tied up in ribbons and left at the doors of the police station like an early Christmas present.

And all the public kept asking the trio was ‘what took you so long?’

The cops were very cross.

They were being made to look bad.

And then one day, something terrible almost happened.

While chasing some crooks on foot, the cops were intercepted by Daylight Saver

She grabbed the crook’s legs with both hands.

He fell to the ground with a mighty thud.

But…oh no, he had a gun in his hand.

A gun is a most terrible weapon indeed.

And it went off in his hand as he did so.

And it grazed a passer-by right in the shoulder.

The police and Daylight Saver were both horrified.

The civilian was a little boy.

Daylight Saver quickly took her leave.

The police took the blame from an angry mob.

Now everyone was angry.

Something had to be done.

The cops went to their chief and complained.

They pointed out that Daylight Saver was a vigilante, and vigilantism was against the law.

She was a civilian, not an active member of the police, and was thus answerable to the law.

The Chief listened to them and understood their plight.

He issued a warrant for Daylight Saver’s arrest.

The three cops put together a plan to catch Daylight Saver.

To stop her once and for all, they needed to unmask her.

And when she was unmasked, they would have to tell someone.

What did I tell you earlier in the story?

Say it with me

YOU MUSTN’T TELL

But they have to, or Daylight Saver will carry on being reckless, and the public would lose faith more and more in their local police.

Sometimes you have to tell the truth about someone for the greater good.

So they put their heads together, and came up with a plan of action.

The next day, Sammy York jumped out of bed.

She brushed her teeth.

She combed her hair

She had her breakfast.

She kissed a photograph of the boys she knew from school.

And then she set about putting on her costume.

She admired herself in the mirror.

“This will be a day worth saving” she said.

She leapt out of the window and jumped from rooftop to rooftop

She cut her journey short at one specific building which overlooked most of the city.

It was breathtaking.

She used to play on these rooftops with the boys all the time.

She almost jumped off the roof when she was little.

She wanted to feel as the birds did whenever they spread their wings.

But you mustn’t tell anyone about that either.

Jumping off high buildings is not for little girls, or boys.

Not unless you have had plenty of practise.

Now that she was all grown-up, she could jump off as many rooftops as she liked.

She knew her reflexes and ability to use a grappling hook would assure her a certain swing to safety.

She felt free.

She was alive.

Suddenly, so was everyone else.

Bustling activity in the city square.

Police cars surrounded the entire area.

Three men in ski masks flowed out of the local bank carrying bags of money

A  robbery was taking place.

She swung down to see if she could help.

As she landed, she felt like she was standing in something wet.

She looked down and found her feet were having difficulty budging from the spot.

She saw members of the public looking concerned, all of them were being kept at a distance.

She tried to move again, but could not.

She realized the ground beneath her feet had been laced with a special glue.

The robbers removed their masks to reveal Roger, Ramsey and Jet.

“You fell for our trap” they said.

Daylight was stunned.

“I’m on your side, cut me loose” she said.

“No, you operate outside the law, we cannot permit that any longer” said Roger.

“People could be hurt worse than that boy was the last time you ‘saved the day’” added Ramsey.

“So we have to take you in, and we must know your identity” concluded Jet.

“No, no, you mustn’t tell” said Daylight.

Roger reached out and tugged at the fabric of her mask.

Daylight smiled.

For she was well prepared.

She reached into her utility belt and produced a small capsule, she let it drop to the ground.

As it did so, It burst into a cloud of big, black smoke.

She grabbed both Roger and Ramsey’s heads as they approached her and smacked them together, knocking them out.

She slipped out of her boots and ran barefoot across the street.

Jet was very alert however, and gave chase through the smoke.

He chased her into an alleyway.

He made a grab for her legs with both hands.

Down she went with a loud thud.

The struggle was on as Jet made his move and reached for her mask with his right hand

The full weight of his legs pressed down on Daylight Saver’s back.

She only had one free arm, the other was pinned back by Jet’s left hand.

Jet slowly used his right hand to forcefully peel the mask off of her face.

When it came loose in his hand, his next order of business was to turn Daylight’s body over so she could formerly identify her

Daylight struggled, refusing to turn, she covered her eyes with her free hand.

Jet seized control of her arm and wrestled it away from her face.

He reeled back, in shock.

Sammy York, his friend from school, someone who was still his friend, was Daylight Saver.

Sammy’s eyes told a telling tale.

Her real name was no longer a secret.

She would soon be known to everyone.

Her career as a superhero would be over.

And she had only her inexperience and overconfidence to blame.

“Don’t cry Sammy” said Jet, “I will let you go”

“Why would you do that?” asked a confused Sammy.

“Because I’ve always loved you, and I know you would never intentionally hurt anyone” he said, stroking her face with the delicate touch of his fingers.

“This is not very becoming of a police officer” Sammy said, “If I were you, I’d throw the book at me”

“If you let me train you, you can be a great help to us, but you must keep to the shadows from now on and let us take the credit so the public can regain their trust in us” Jet replied.

Sammy smiled and nodded. She understood.

Jet handed her back her mask, “Here” he said, “I will say you made good your escape, we will meet each other later tonight and we’ll begin working together, But remember, this is our secret, YOU MUSTN’T TELL”

Sammy nodded again and gave her friend a big hug.

She did not know what to make of his feelings for her just yet, but she would see what their relationship going forward would bring.

Eventually it all worked out.

Daylight Saver became more experienced and less clumsy, she also operated in the evening as she could no longer be a trusted public figure.

Now she was the Night Shifter.

Jet was her mentor, her partner, and her confidant, and his training brought out the best in her.

He and his friends were able to restore the good name in the local police department.

And over a year later, Sammy York returned his feelings for her.

And once they began their relationship, they had to tell everyone.

So everyone could have a party at their wedding.

After the wedding, came the honeymoon.

And you know what happens on the first night of your honeymoon don’t you?

You do.

BUT YOU MUSTN’T TELL.